Lessons I Should Learn from My Dog

I love my dog.  I picked him out from a shelter several years ago.  He had only been in the shelter a week and the frightened, WTF eyes got to me.  I walked away, I drove away, and then I had to turn the car around.  There was this sense of connection and knowledge that he needed me and he was mine.  Maybe I am just a soft touch but I can’t think of my life without him .. and I did not want a dog.  At the shelter, he was a friendly dog but when I got him home, I found he was extremely protective of me and aggressive towards other dogs.  I have had to work with him and train him in order to allow visitors into my house.  He was never socialized with other dogs and I will always have to be cautious in those situations.

My dog makes submission look easy though.  I am not naturally submissive nor am I a service sub in its truest sense and yet I determined to be what Sir needs.  Some days I think I am the worse sub in the universe and I start asking myself questions.  My questions revolve around the difference between ownership, obedience, and submission and what it is I am.  Each facet of what I am is defined emotionally by different feelings, thoughts and points of view.  There is probably some overlap but I felt I needed some assistance in figuring this out.  Who could I ask?  But of course, my dog!  The dog and I are owned, we obey, and we submit when necessary.

In the morning as I put on my collar, my dog looks at me and must wonder why I am wearing a collar since I am the owner.  I tell him that I am owned also and my dog and I look at each other in communal understanding.  But what does it mean to feel owned?  My dog counts on me for shelter, food, and love.  We enjoy walks together in the cooler weather now and look for squirrels and deer.  He loves to have his belly rubbed and get scratched under his collar.  I look at this list and no I don’t want to chase squirrels but OK maybe my belly rubbed?  Synonymous with shelter, food, and love is the security, friendship, and safety I feel in my relationship with Sir.  It is this “knowingness” of existence.  My collar is on and maybe even shackles and I wonder if he thinks of owning me during his busy day.  Ownership must be similar to how a wolf feels within the safety of her pack knowing the alpha-male has her well-being in mind.  I know my dog acclimated to my household and looks to me as the alpha-being in his life.  He knows I am there just as I look to the tug of the leash when I need to know Sir is there.

My dog and I have rules to live by within the pack.  My dog knows not to sleep on the couch and I know not to wear underwear.  Our rules tell us how to live our life each day and in doing that, we please our Masters.  Obedience reinforces the good feelings of finding that pack where we are safe.  Our rules are specific though to our pack and make us feel a part of it.  My day begins and ends with a text to Sir and although many relationships have this rule, the ritual of our texts is ours and delineates our pack of two. I often write I love my rules that Sir has given me.  Sir rules become as solid as rope binding us together and just as there is love in rope, there is love in rules.  But I do catch my dog on the couch sometimes just as Sir catches me with disobedience.  My dog and I dislike punishment, both verbal and physical, but need that focus and consequence of bad behavior.  Otherwise just as my dog constantly begs at the dinner table since I am not strict about this, I too would run amok.

I can never retain or grasp the meaning of the word submission and frequently have to look it up.  The definition is the act of accepting or yielding to the will of a superior force.  I watch my dog submit and wonder how he does it so readily.   My dog yields to me easily as the reinforcement of ownership and obedience to my rules is accepted daily by him.  When I take him for a walk and we see the deer, he struggles against the collar and leash until he hears my clipped verbal “NO … SIT”.  He desires with all his heart and soul to be free to chase those deer, hunt them down, and then maybe eat them.  Perhaps it is buried deep down inside his domesticated behavior but I believe he remembers it when he scents the deer on the wind.  My personal definition of submission is a deliberate action on my part that takes this internal desire to be something other than what Sir wishes and surrendering my wishes to his.

And I bristle at the concept of yielding to a superior or authoritative force.  I must feel to be his equal although our situations speak otherwise.  Unlike my dog, my choice to submit must be an intelligent response to the trust, friendship, and mutual respect I sense in our relationship.  And perhaps my dog is smarter than me, he knew who to look at with those big brown eyes.  So when Sir tells me “MEET ME”, I also sense the freedom on the wind and must remember I am also domesticated.  This is why I struggle with the definition of submission because it must be a decision where the balance of will is equally weighed and only his fingertip on the balance, obedience, or praise makes me yield.  The act must be one that I would not necessarily do of my own free will but must be the result of accepting his will as my own.  My dog has no such difficulties about his submission.  One glance from me and his body language shows he knows who is in command.

So am I smarter than my dog?  Probably not since he is a happy fellow chasing a stick and shaking his little stuffed toys to death and I struggle most of the time trying to figure out what he knows naturally.  And I think that word, naturally, is the key to what my dog has taught me.  I feel owned and safe, I obey Sir’s rules, and when he asks me to be submissive, I will try not to rebel.  Submission does not come easy to me so I must work at it.  Woof!

 

About bonimiss

bonimiss only found her kinky side in her early 50s and thankfully found Sir shortly after. She is is a long distance journey with Sir and is constantly amazed at the new and exciting experiences and discoveries. You can contact her at bonimiss through the Submissive Guide Community.
This entry was posted in Emotions, Submission and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>